Poop Wars

Just a little over 20 weeks. Everyone’s been saying that I’m already showing. My immediate first instinct upon hearing that is to suck in my tummy and frown. Why do I do that? I worked so hard for this bump. And let’s face by the time evening rolls around I pretty much waddling. He gets so heavy as the day rolls on. I’m wearing a hoodie and sweatpants to work today (freezing temps in the office and skeleton crew) and you can definitely see the bump even though the hoodie is a size too big.

Our level 2 ultrasound went really well. I do have partial placenta previa but they don’t seem concerned. I have to do a fetal echocardiogram on the 6th and she said they’ll check the previa again to see if it’s moved and if not we have to talk about c-section. Dun dun duuuun. Just kidding. When the tech was doing the ultrasound I was reading her labels and I saw her write “complete previa” so I was prepared for c-section talk. And the more I think about it, the more okay I am with a c-section. Sometimes when I read about 4th degree tears I wonder if we shouldn’t just do it anyway. But I guess the thing that’s keeping me from swinging too much in either direction is fear of the epidural paralysing me in a c-section birth and fear of my asshole exploding during vaginal birth. Neither would be an ideal outcome. That said, I’m trying to stay away from horror stories in both scenarios and I’m just trying to enjoy the day to day.

Dandelion was extremely busy during the ultrasound. There was a lot of tut tutting from the tech every time he moved when she was trying to take a measurement. Especially pulling his little feet away from her. So cute! I wish ultrasounds were more like a tv screen they put over your belly so you can see what they actually look like. Although that might be not as cute.

Anyway, we got a few pics of him. She was so good, I don’t know when she snapped them because he was so fast but she managed to get it all done. She tried a 3D one too but he wasn’t having it. I’ll try for a 3D when I go for the echo.

I still can’t believe how fast all of this is going. I sometimes look at Lucky and feel a tiny bit sad for him. He doesn’t even realise that he’s not going to be an only child anymore. I think what’s makes me sad is his obliviousness to it. He doesn’t know that his world will be turned upside down for a while. All he cares about is sword fighting and eating and literally running up and down for no reason.

I guess you could say we’re fully into potty training now as well. It happened about as organically as it can I suppose. I toyed with the idea at the beginning of quarantine, you’ll remember, but we quickly gave up, like with most things. He was putting himself to sleep successfully a while back and somehow we’re back to staying in bed with him until he falls asleep and we don’t know how. Anyway, when we heard I’d be going back to work and N’s mom would be taking Lucky again she had me buy him a potty for her house and some cool underwear and she would do it. Yay!

The Sunday before I was set to go to work I thought I’d practice. I showed him the undies (superhero) and he was over the moon. He actually peed in the potty all day. He had success with her all the next day too but then we fell off a bit on the Tuesday. He made me put 4 pairs of undies on him at the same time then proceeded to pee on through all 4 so I just put him in diapers the rest of the day.

The rest of the week we flip flopped between diapers and undies. I hope you’re taking notes because this is obviously how potty training should be done :).

This week we have a new thing now. No undies and no diapers. He refuses both so I don’t know if this is a win or not. I hope it’s just a phase. But he has been successfully using the potty like a champ. The only real issue we had was when I was laying on the couch and he walked up to me and said “I’m going to pee on you”. I just laughed and said no please don’t. And this little terrorist proceeded TO PEE DIRECTLY ON ME!!! Thank goodness I was quick and he just got the couch but he got into a lot of trouble for that one with his dad. Yikes! Since then, no threats of urinary harm were leveled against me.

Pooping is a whole other beast. It’s only be a few days of refusing diapers but he also refuses to poop in the potty so I’ll give you 2 guesses as to where he’s been pooping.

$100 if you guessed grandma’s deck and another 100 if you guessed the kitchen floor. Thank goodness only 2 poops and it’s good that he knows he should go in the potty. He just doesn’t want to. It’s okay though. He’ll figure it out. I do worry that he’ll clench up and get really backed up but I’m keeping an eye on it. I have no qualms with abandoning this whole operation so he can poop in his diaper to his heart’s content. I’m also happy for him to poop on all the floors until he gets the hang of it. Thankfully we won’t be visiting anyone anytime soon.

So it’s been quite a fun journey. My son has weaponised his penis and now I have to be on the lookout for poop landmines for the foreseeable future. I highly recommend it if you’re looking for a way to spice up your life.

I’ll have him all to myself for the next 3 days so let’s see what this weekend will bring.

Before I go. Quick question on a totally unrelated topic. It looks like everyone is slowly opening up their states. What is your plan for Independence Day weekend? If you’re not in the US but you are going into summer, do you have any plans for summer weekends?




4 thoughts on “Poop Wars

  1. Isaac is pretty much always naked if we’re at home. He still won’t pull his shorts down (even though I’ve seen him do it so I know he CAN) so I’ve had a few times where I had to run outside to pull them down, then he immediately wanted them back up, then down, yeah like 5-10 times then ended up pooping in his shorts because I wasn’t fast enough once (even though they had been off plenty in the previous 2 minutes).

    We currently don’t have any 4th of July plans. Normally we’d go to my husbands aunts house, but they’ve opened up their home to everyone at their church at least once a week and I’m not sure how comfortable we are with that. If we don’t do that my ILs may host the immediate family at their house for swim and bbq.

  2. So I remember we got a bunch of good 3D ultrasounds with C, but D would have none of it. She kept her arm in front of her face allllll the time!! I think we got one good partial face in 3d, but that’s it.
    Good luck potty training! C was sooooo hard, I’m really not looking forward to going through it all over again with D. BUT, she’s already sitting on the potty seat and saying “Pee!”, and she gets all the stuff out and lays down for us to change her diaper, and will sometimes tell us when she poops. I feel like she’s ready to potty train, but I’m definitely not! Maybe once she hits 2, we’ll see what happens.
    Everything here locally has already been cancelled as far as 4th of July fesitivities. 😦 We’re going to take the long weekend and go visit my mom in NY. (Western NY, not NYC.) Most things there have been cancelled already as well. We’re going to drive a bit further north to visit more family on the holiday, so I think we’ll just have a fun time with them. Numbers are continuing to go down in both our areas, so hopefully things stay on this trend! I’m REALLY eager for life to start to get back to some sort of normalcy.
    I’m so happy that everything is going well with you and baby!!

  3. You certainly have a lot going on! Wear the bump with pride, lady. I also suffered from this kind of thing but really you are pregnant so don’t suck it in. Be proud!
    Regarding the poop on the floor, I had a couple of similar incidents and I picked up the poop (use gloves and/or plastic bags) and showed to N that I was putting it in the toilet as that’s where poop goes. I didn’t tell him off but just physically showed him where it goes. We then waved bye to it and said “bye bye yucky poo” and he pressed the button on the toilet so was part of the whole process. Obviously then I needed to go have a head to toe shower but it helped him to learn where poo goes. Slowly, slowly but he will get there! xx

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