Well here we go. Cycle day 1 has arrived. And today also happens to be 1 year, 1 month and 1 day since my last cycle day one.
I started this post at work earlier and I was trying to gauge my feelings about this cycle. At the time I was deep in the throws of violent cramping, as I’d forgotten my pain killers at home, and I was not feeling excited at all. My exact words were that this cycle feels like I am getting back with an ex.
I still feel like that more than I am excited at this point. I feel like I’m waiting for something to fuck up so that I can admonish myself for getting my hopes up.
Things are going to be different this cycle however so it’s not like I’m getting back with the same old ex who “did me wrong”. I’ll be getting back with an ex who has shown proof that he’s changed, so there’s reason to hope that things will turn out differently this time.
For one, we’re doubling my dose of meds so that, in the words of my RE, we’re not playing catch up. I’m not doing acupuncture this time. I know it comes highly recommended but It’s a bit expensive and it didn’t work last time. I’ve opted instead for Zita West’s IVF relaxation and meditation cd that I got from a friend and yoga. And finally, N and I are all loaded up on 3+ months of fertility friendly vitamins.
None of this is a guarantee of anything but I feel a little more prepared I think. And I’m a little relieved that my nerves from before are replaced with this feeling of indifference. It’s helping me not crumble into a million pieces.
I spoke to the nurse today and I’m to do the blood pregnancy test on Thursday and start birth control pills the same day if the test comes back negative (rolls eyes). My baseline ultrasound is on the 25th and I’ll stop birth control on the same day. Then I’ll wait for instructions on when to start injections. Oh, the meds should be delivered on Friday.
Maybe when I see the meds I’ll get excited. Why am I not excited? Hmmm.
In the meantime, cheers to 1 1 1!! On to the next one!
Tales of a 30 Year Old Nothing 
Oooh, I love all those ones! I am so excited for you, eeeeeee! Good luck and keep us posted.
I’ll definitely keep you posted. Even when the transfer comes around. Keeping that a secret was very difficult. not doing that again. Thank you very much!
Good luck with this cycle! Maybe it’s better to not be overly excited and ramped up for this? I know everyone says it’s better to go into things calm…maybe it will help you out!
Yes! I fully agree. Maybe a first failed cycle really is just a lesson in keeping calm. Thank you!
I’m so hopeful for you right now! Wishing you the best this cycle!! ☺
Thank you my friend! We can only hope we get better results this time.
Good luck! Glad you’re feeling more prepared for the cycle. You can do it!
Thank you so much!
Good for you! I’m a bit after you and will be doing the same sorts of things! 🙂
I’m excited for your next cycle. These changes will hopefully help with the lack of control with these things.
Yey for new cycle and a fresh approach!! Lots of luck for you and hoping it all goes smoothly from the get go 🙂
Thank you very much!!
I love numbers, so 1 1 1 sounds very lucky to me!!
Me too. I’m taking it as a sign. I actually budgeted for 11 embryos to send for PGS testing. We’ll just leave it at that :). (I doubt we’ll get 11 but a girl can dream right?)
Sending you lots of luck for this cycle ❤️
Thank you so much!
Praying for a smooth and happy ending cycle!
Thanks hun! Me too! x
Yay for a new cycle. Wishing you the best. xo
Yay indeed! Thank you!!
I’m so excited for you to be at this stage!! I will be praying for you my friend!
Thank you very much love!!!